Most of our lives we’ll find ourselves living to help others. Whether it’s family friends lovers pets or even strangers.
Countless times one may find themselves putting any and maybe everyone else needs and wants above their own. Quite frankly it’s amazing to be in the predicament to be able to help others. It also makes you an amazing person with a humongous heart ❤.
Butttt…. yeap there’s always a but. What happens when you’re alone and no one else is there? Now I know some may say they have a huge support system, many friends, a significant other and the list may continue. They may support you emotionally, physically, spiritually, and financially. That’s absolutely amazing. However with or without that support I still feel as if at some point many people will still have a moment or even a second of loneliness. And more often than not it may come from the fact that a situation you’re going through you may feel others can’t relate to you.
So what happens then? How do you cope? The first step should begin with getting in tune with yourself. Actually sit down and figure out what it is that you like. True story someone asked me what’s my favorite things to do, favorite meal, and favorite TV shows. Well my answers all revolved around things I like to do with my children. Yikes! Then I sat down and thought harder and the answer was I didn’t know.
I do believe that’s why it’s so hard for many people to be alone. You get used to repetition of routines, and when that disappears you feel lost. I mean it’s not far fetched. Think about a job you’ve worked for years and put your heart, sweat and tears into, then boom you get fired. Or a marriage that lasted years then suddenly a divorce. Or for the parents the empty nest syndrome.
That’s why I believe others should always be an addition to you and your life. It’s not to say you’re any less of a caring person. But you’re going to have to start incorporating things for yourself in your life. Now go on and explore to see what it is that makes you who you really are. If need be take that step alone. You’ll be both surprised and happy with your end results. Then maybe the next time someone ask you about yourself you’ll say without a doubt what defines you. #Selfcare.
What are people’s real intentions, is a question many people ponder. Do they really love you or just love the idea of you? Will it be long jevity or a temporary meaningless waste of time. How can one tell?
First let’s start with what defines love. Well some people feel as if it’s defined by the actions you show one during each aspects of life. Then it goes deeper into being in love. As some say; you can love without being in love. So if to love is to prove without a doubt a person is of an upmost importance in your life. Then to be in love would mean there’s a connection deeper within your soul that makes you feel lifeless with even the thought of not having that person be a part of your life. So now what is lust then, and does it even matter? I mean it is just a desire after all isn’t it?
The defined meaning of lust is, to have a strong sexual desire for someone. Now I’ve heard lusting is bad. But isn’t loving incorrectly as equally horrible? The way I view it is there’s things in life you want and then there’s things in life you need. Sometimes the necessities are overshadowed by our yearning of luxuries.
How many times do people say they’re grateful yet feel the need to show it? Not because they really aren’t but because they really are appreciative and feel as if that should be enough. Some of the basic survival needs are: air, food, water, shelter, clothing and safety. We become accustomed to these things and having them just becomes a part of life. Yet when we lose them we begin to realize how much more important they were to us and start to show more gratitude. Now let us get a new car, jewelery, a fancy house, alot of money or an all paid expense vacation. We’d probably be smiling ear to ear, super excited, dancing, and maybe even start showboating.
In relationships many times. Our feelings resemble just the same as our wants and needs. The beginning is filled with lust and wants. Years down the line comes the love and needs. Which is why some say the honeymoon phase is over. Yes one may know you love them but still feel so empty because they miss the extra mile you once went to show them in the beginning. So when it comes to loving and lusting do both. Keep that same energy you started with. Everytime you see your significant other act like it’s a million dollar ticket to that luxurious lifestyle you always wanted. Because at the end of the day you may not get that million but you did get that special person who chose to be a part of you with or without the upscaled life you always dreamed of.
I’m sure everyone has had a day or million where they want to just say screw this shhhi…..nanagins lol. Then go back and forth with the decision of whether they’re going to walk away or just try harder the next day.
As time goes by one or two things end up happening. You either adapt to the situation or deep down have that gut feeling that it’s time to part ways. However more times than not something keeps you sticking around. I’m sure we all can come up with reasons why. Here’s where the “but” comes in at. But, but, but…. it’s beneficial due to money or it’s for the kids or maybe things will change and the main one what will I do next.
Well I can think of a few things. Maybe, start with having more faith in your self. Know and believe that you’re more than capable of maneuvering through obstacles. But don’t stop there. Use those obstacles to your advantage. Don’t settle! No doubt that it might actually be easier to walk away, and it sometimes take more strength to stick around and make things work. But is that really true? Over and over again that saying pops up that only the strong survive. Heck I’m strong enough to carry two arms, two shoulders, and sometimes a neck full of groceries in the house. No 2nd trips lol.
Yet, still can’t manage to open a jar of pickles without almost breaking my wrist. Clearly strength comes in different forms lol. So the answer to my original question is…….. drum roll, belly roll, tootsie roll please……….
Leaving doesn’t make you weak while staying makes you strong. Nor does staying make you weak and leaving makes you strong. Sounds confusing, a little contradicting, or maybe even tricky right? It’s really not though. Quite simple actually. How much one can tolerate will eventually be the final determination of what choice you should make. When the time comes you will know. Just make sure you don’t let fear over shadow your choice. Also please don’t let others make the decision for you. Take in what they say and use it as part of your evaluation of course. But, you make the final say so. Happiness can differ from person to person. So what shall your joyful destiny be?
It’s ok to just say no today. Say no to the stress. Absolutely no way to self doubt. Get those overdue bills out of your face until you have the funds to pay. Staring and worrying won’t get them paid any sooner. Turn your phone on do not disturb. Avoid anything that will make you feel less than amazing today.
The only yes you should say today is yes to you feeling great.
That’s right! Pack your special little items that you like to tag along with you on a daily and go. Of course Corona style though.
Ok maybe a little too far how about this one instead lol.
Go where might you ask. Anywhere your current situation can take you. Whether it be for a few minutes or a few hours. Everyone deserves some “me” time.
Go for a brisk walk. Or take a drive around town with your favorite music playing. If you’re at work take a quick step outside enjoy the breeze then get back to work before you get fired lol. Go to the store and give yourself a 5- 10 dollar budget limit. Challenge yourself to get items that you think you can use to enjoy your night with.
Just remember to keep it fun yet relaxing. But most importantly just get out and enjoy yourself today.
I am the capitalized Queen of keeping it 💯. Don’t ask me to tell you the truth because I may or may not be able to control what will come out of my mouth next.
I’m all team you. The you being whomever I’m close with. Whether it be family or friends. And I will definitely always be your biggest fan girl. If you work at a fast food restaurant I’m going to tell you: There is no me without you and the food you cook to keep my life substained. Seriously we have to eat to survive and I’ll willingly admit I’m not going to be over a stove, oven, air fryer, or microwave after even stepping a toe at my job. Even if it was just for a 30 minute meeting.
Here’s the tricky part of being too real though. One can be real…….. brutal, mean, unforgiving, nonchalant, fierce, biased, selfish and abusive. The list can go on longer than the baby hairs us women try to save after getting braids and sew-ins. Longer than a man’s list of “auditions” before he finally settle down. But that’s a topic for another day.
Now this is where self reflection comes in at. That moment you were being so authentic at what cost was it? How did you feel afterwards? What about the other person? And if you’re one of those I don’t care people then you may be just a tad bit more stubborn than me lol. But if you don’t care about anything else what about your energy?
It’s true that you receive the same energy that you put into the universe. Ok I’m not a scientist but that did sound good to me 😅 and I’m pretty sure I’ve heard that somewhere before. And I’m all about conserving my energy. Give me 5 minutes anywhere anytime and I’ll show you…..
Nap over 😴. Ok back to reality here. I always say live life in the moment. So at that very next moment you get that you could be keeping it real with someone just make sure it’s well spent. Cause one thing is for sure, seconds turn into minutes then minutes turn into decades. Interactions turn into memories. As time pass us all by at some point those memories will be what we use as reflections of our life. Ok I’m sure I’ve taken up way too much of your time already. So until next time my gracious peeps 😉.
I got up this morning with a million dollar mind. And maybe a solid $50 in my purse. Since I’m pretty good at math most times I figured let me add this a couple of times. Then bam I ended up with a few million lol. Ok in reality I woke up tripped off of my own foot out the bed as I was scrounging around for my glasses. But hey top of the morning my gracious people. Have a wonderful day 😊
I could just say I’m sitting in the house bored. Oh yea and lonely considering I’m super single especially on nights like tonight. You know the extra breezy long nights. Buuuttt I won’t lol mainly due to pride or maybe just because I’m speaking positive vibes into the uuuunnniiiivveerrrssse. Too much lol maybe. Well what I will willingly say is hello everyone. And I hope you’re making the best of your night like I am. What am I doing 🤔. Let’s just say taking in the moment. I didn’t have to work, and I may or may not have eaten a bunch of junk foods the whole day 😳. All while refraining from spending unnecessary money online um preferably at……..Amazon. Look at me go lol. Whooo hoooo! And so says you can’t have fun being a homebody. Come on people let’s live it up together. Who’s with me? Anyone.